"I just felt it wasn't right to send my children to a daycare center," says Millar, 35. "Financially, it is a real struggle not to bring in the second income. And I miss the challenges of work. But raising children is something you can do right just once."

While many women are juggling work and family, Millar is among a growing number of career women who are leaving the workforce to take care of their babies.

According to the latest U.S. Census data, the labor force participation rates of mothers with infants fell from a record-high 59 percent in 1998 to 55 percent in 2000, the first significant decline since the Census Bureau developed the indicator in 1976.

"The decline has occurred primarily among mothers in the workforce who were 30 years old and over, white women, married women living with their husbands, and women who had completed one or more years of college," says Census analyst Martin O'Connell.

Many Silicon Valley stay-at-home mothers fit the profile. Like Millar, most of them are well-educated and focused on their career before having their first baby.

But staying home with babies can be a lonely proposition for these bright, active women who find themselves committed to a demanding job that has few breaks and little adult interaction.

"In the old days, your neighborhood was really your neighborhood. Families had children around the same time and they went through the same things together," Millar says. "But in Silicon Valley, most people are transients. People don't mix well because of long working hours and cultural differences. You need to reach out to find your neighborhood."

These mother support groups form according to their members' location, interests and needs. They range from groups for breast-feeding to groups for teaching baby sign language and baby and parent yoga to groups for stroller walks.

Recognizing this new marketing niche, the business community is starting to offer the forums where these mothers meet.

Before the Oaks Theater in Cupertino closed on Feb. 27, it had "Diaper Day" twice a month for mothers with small babies. Restaurants in the Oaks Shopping Center offered 10 percent off for parents who went to Diaper Day.

"The movie theater was packed and noisy with babies crying and squealing," says Eden Tanovitz, 40. She went to see the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding with her 6-month-old son, Isaac, and her El Camino Hospital mother's support group.

"Isaac stood on my lap. He was very excited and yelled a lot," Tanovitz says. "We had a good time."

Health clubs such as the Linda Evans fitness centers and 24 Hour Fitness as well as the YMCA offer day-care services so mothers can work out.

"Some women come in, drop the children at the day-care center and just take a shower," says Cami Smiley, front desk manager of Linda Evans Fitness Center in Cupertino. "They just want to take a break."

Some business owners are new mothers who found that the market failed to meet their needs.

Mae-ling Tien opened Keiki Place, 10931 Maxine Ave., on Sept. 24, 2002—the day her son, Kyle, turned one. Keiki Place provides activities such as yoga and parenting classes for mothers and music classes for parents and babies. Keiki Place even has a daddies day when fathers come with their babies so mothers can go out and visit friends.

Tien, 33, says Keiki Place was born out of a desire to have one place that fulfills the needs of both parents and young children.

Tien says, "When Kyle was born, I signed up for a few parent and child classes, and I found the experience of packing up and driving somewhere was often a lot of work and even stressful. The outing is worthwhile only if our destination is family-friendly and the activities factor in the needs of both the babies and the parents."

Tien has definitely capitalized on this niche. Although it opened only six months ago, Keiki Place is already serving more than 800 families.

"When I was a stay-at-home mom, I had 5 o'clock blues after taking care of Kyle all day long and not knowing what to cook for dinner," Tien says. "If Keiki Place can give moms a place to meet other parents and relax so moms don't have the 5 o'clock blues, I think I have done a good thing."

Although the business world is recognizing these stay-at-home mothers as valuable customers, many stay-at-home mothers feel there is still a stigma against them.

"You are what you earn," says Marina Peregrino, an engineer who left her career to be a stay-at-home mom. Peregrino, 38, is expecting her second child in April. "Families in Silicon Valley especially have more pressure. The living expenses are higher. And you are expected to work hard and succeed."

Some stay-at-home moms decided to return to work because of financial challenges.

Cheryl Dailey, 38, says she will return to work as a massage therapist once her daughter, Alannah, is old enough. Dailey quit her job when Alannah was born 23 months ago.

"My husband was just laid off," Dailey says. "Since my daughter can tolerate a few hours of not being able to see me, I can start working on a few patients. But still, she is the most precious thing in my life."

Millar understands how financially vulnerable a one-income family feels. But she wants to stay at home taking care of her children as long as her husband and she can afford to.

"We feel very insecure living in Silicon Valley," Millar says. "But I feel so grateful to be able to see my children grow up. It is the most rewarding experience I've ever had."