Los Gatos Weekly-Times

A Soccer Mom talks about the election

By Carl Heintze

During our recent national election, I became intrigued by Soccer Moms. They seem to have had a big influence on its outcome. So, I decided to go right to the source and interview the Soccer Mom I know best. She's a real Soccer Mom, too. Not a statistic or a clone, but rather a real mom who deals daily with soccer--and a lot of other things like family, food and keeping up with a rigorous job.

Her younger daughter is a member of the San Luis Flames. Thus far this season, the Flames have a record somewhat like the 49ers: mixed.

Anyway, soccer is a really big part of this Soccer Mom's life. It means evening and weekend games, both at home and elsewhere, soccer meetings, dealing with other Soccer Moms and Dads, and trying to squeeze dinner and homework in between these events.

I know a little about this world, but not much. That's because I've seen a couple of the Flames' games, one of them an evening match. We assembled in the semi-dusk before supper to watch small green-clad girls dashing back and forth over the field in pursuit of a goal. The Flames got three that particular night and won. Much cheering and all the usual post-match rituals. Then we all repaired to a local pizza parlor for pizza, soft drinks and beer and a post-game critique. The pizza was supper for the Soccer Mom, her family and us (she eats a lot of meals like that on the fly, as it were). Then it was home to pick up the pieces of regular life, the pieces that get squeezed between homework, chores and a little time with her husband, who is, of course, a Soccer Dad.

It seems a fairly frantic life to me, but it was a long time ago, when I had a lot more stamina than I do now, that I went through the same thing. I wasn't exactly a Soccer Dad, but rather a sort of all-purpose transporter.

In those days, I shuttled her back and forth to dances, backpacking trips, Camp Fire Girls and the like. Maybe it was frantic then, too, although it doesn't seem that way now. Just one of the best parts of an often misspent life.

Anyway, I asked the Soccer Mom about the election. She voted, no surprise, for Clinton. That's what Soccer Moms were supposed to have done.

When I asked her why, she said, "Well, I couldn't vote for Bob Dole because I not only can't relate to him, I can barely listen to him. In other words, I don't like his style. I might, however, vote for his wife, whose experience and style is more appealing."

So why, I asked, did she, and presumably a lot of other Soccer Moms, vote for Bill Clinton?

Here's her answer:

"I voted for Bill because I like Hillary and because he seems real, seems sincere and seems more in touch with families."

The Soccer Mom also has this to say about the election and its relationship to her cultural class:

"Most women I know are concerned about making ends meet, being able to find time to spend with their kids and husbands, offering opportunities to their children, paying for braces, helping with homework, whipping up some sort of semi-healthy dinner and maybe reading a page or two from a magazine or newspaper now and again. We are also concerned about our kids keeping up with the pace of life, how they are going to balance career, kids, marriage and their sanity."

Which I guess is what moms have always done. What's different is that Soccer Moms--indeed, all the women of the Baby Boomer generation--are different than the moms we older folks grew up with or even the moms we married. They are, indeed, it seems to me, the moms we hoped that we would raise. That's the way I feel about my particular Soccer Mom, anyway.

Today most Soccer Moms have been working for 20 years or more. They're aware of the difference that makes. For 20 years, they've made their own money and often, as single parents, made their own way. Thrust into independence, they came to relish it and to know its importance. They want their children to be the same way. They're not afraid to take on things as complex as being the mother of a soccer player, nor are they particularly impressed by the fact that their soccer daughter goes at the game with devotion and verve. That's the way it ought to be.

This self-sufficiency colors their view of politics.

Unlike some males who see Hillary Clinton as a threat, they've come to accept her as one of their own. Feeling close to Hillary maybe helps them understand Bill a little better. They've been there, just as the president's wife has, and they can relate to her. Being the First Lady would be no particular challenge to a lot of them. Even better would be being the True First Lady, the first female U.S. president. Just because it hasn't happened yet, don't believe that it won't.

I'm sure it will, even if I'm not sure when.

Just how Soccer Dads will accept this remains to be seen, but my guess is that real Soccer Dads--dads who are as devoted to their families as their Soccer Mates are--will deal fairly well with this when it happens. Even as old crocks like me who were raised with their mothers mostly in the kitchen railed against the First Lady, the first female attorney general, our two female U.S. senators and even the various female mayors, so will Soccer Dads accept what they already know as real life, the women with whom they now share equal status.

Who knows, some of all this may even rub off on Soccer Grandpas, who have begun, although reluctantly, to know the importance of the World Cup and why the goalie can pick up the ball even when no one else can.

So look out for Soccer Moms. They are a potent and growing political force. Their clout is as important as their dedication. Bill Clinton owes them a lot. I just hope he doesn't forget it.

Carl Heintze is a frequent contributor to the Los Gatos Weekly-Times.