Some hate it. Singles never know if the person they're eyeing could be married or already dating someone. It's often loud in bars, making it difficult to talk. When phone numbers are exchanged, are they fake? Will the person actually call?

Add to that the fact that most people work long hours in the Silicon Valley, and trying to meet someone can be a full-time job in itself.

So it's no surprise that many have turned to the one tool they stare at for most of the day—hoping to finding the elusive one on the computer.

Views on Internet dating have been divided. But there are some happy couples in Los Gatos and Saratoga who, after much searching, say they finally found "The One," thanks to a little help from the Internet. Here are the stories of how they met and fell in love, and how they are looking forward to celebrating another romantic Valentine's Day next week.

Sheri Hastings and Ken Smith

One Saratoga couple says they found love in the most unlikely of places, thanks to one website that brought them together.

Ken Smith has lived in Saratoga since 1988. He works as an electrical engineer and loves the outdoors.

One day, about three and a half years ago, he was surfing the Internet, and stumbled upon a site called "Love@Netscape." Although he says he had never known anyone who had tried meeting people online, he threw caution to the wind and posted an ad for an activity partner. The site had him answer a few questions about himself and what he was looking for, and write a personalized paragraph for browsers to read.

Smith says he was introduced to several women through the site, but it took a while before he really connected with someone.

"I probably met a dozen women online and went out several times with two or three of them, all over about a year," he says. "Most meetings were just a one time only, in a Starbucks. It's pretty easy to find who you aren't attracted to, or vice versa."

Then, Sheri Hastings replied to Smith. Hastings is a project manager who travels often for her job, which frequently brings her to the South Bay. She responded to Smith's ad for an activity partner, looking for someone to have fun with outdoors whenever she was in town.

"I wasn't looking for a boyfriend," she recalls.

Smith and Hastings talked back and forth for a few months through email before finally deciding to meet in person. When they did, they got along right away, although with very different futures in mind—Smith thought he had found true romance; Hastings thought she had found a great friend to hang out with.

"We're both sort of tree-huggers," says Hastings. "I thought he would be great to go hiking with. He knew a lot about the flora and fauna of this area, so that was really cool."

"I was blown away; I hadn't seen a picture of her," Smith says of the first time he saw her face-to-face. "I was interested right away. The complicating thing was that she was looking for an activity partner, not a boyfriend."

However, Smith says he was happy to take things at her pace, so the two became fast friends.

After a few months, they planned a caving trip to San Andreas.

"We were going to get separate rooms, but there was nowhere to stay but this bed and breakfast and the only room available was the honeymoon suite," Hastings remembers.

Apparently, it was fate.

"We were going to sleep on opposite sides of the bed, but then we woke up together," she says.

That morning, romance revealed itself, and Smith and Hastings have been a happy couple ever since.

"It more or less surprised the both of us," says Smith.

Just a few years later, Hastings lives with Smith in his Saratoga home, and the two say they hear wedding bells in their future.

For Valentine's Day, Hastings says Smith has a romantic dinner for two planned at his fiancée's favorite Saratoga restaurant, The Plumed Horse. Smith says he is thankful he stumbled across "Love@Netscape" when he did.

"Before, [when] I was married, back in the '70s and '80s, it was a lot harder to meet people; there was nothing like this," says Smith.

Brenda Hammond and
John Seckinger

John Seckinger says his wife, Brenda Hammond, is one of the most incredible women in the world, for her unconditional love, unselfishness and complete devotion to her family.

When faced with the possibility of true love with "The One," Hammond, who lives in Los Gatos, put the well-being of her family above her own desires.

It all started about seven years ago.

"I was happily divorced with four kids and was having a great time being single. But when I started complaining to my friends about seeing couples everywhere, I decided it was time to begin my search for the real 'Mr. Right,' " remembers Hammond. "An evening of dinner and wine with my girlfriends landed me with an ad on Webpersonals.com."

Like many other online dating sites, Webpersonals.com asked romance seekers to fill out a questionnaire and write their own personalized paragraph; a photo at the end was optional. Hammond remembers her profile being very specific about what her version of "Mr. Right" would be like.

"I was pretty adamant that I was looking for someone to get married to," she says.

Hammond wanted to avoid the bar scene. Therefore, at least for the first couple of dates, she decided she would require potential suitors to come along on one her favorite outdoor activities—running. No alcohol, no dressing up.

After including all of her criteria, Hammond was sure she would be left with no takers. Imagine her surprise when she received nearly 200 responses. She started to weed through them.

"I tossed out suitors for various reasons—geographic, too old, too young, too much baggage, or I caught them in a lie," she says. "My main criteria was someone who would be patient in meeting me."

Hammond screened her suitors through other self-made tests. For example, men had to be willing to give her all their phone numbers—home, office, cell phone, everything—and they had to be willing to let her call at any hour of the day or night. Despite that, they would not get her number right away. Hammond said this helped weed out married men.

All of these rules definitely helped whittle down the 200 original responders.

"I'd guess that only about 20 or so of the guys ever agreed to these rules," she says. "I met about 12 men in person."

Hammond says none of the men were anything to write home about. She decided she needed to be even more specific in the type of guy she was looking for, so she developed her own "20 Questions."

"They included things like, 'When was the last time you told your mother you loved her,' 'What is your favorite vacation spot,' and 'What song do you know all the words to,' " Hammond recalls.

Finally, a promising suitor presented himself—John Seckinger.

"He was patient and understanding about all my rules, and when he answered all my questions, I was floored—he had told his mother he loved her that very day, his favorite vacation spot was relaxing by the ocean anywhere, and he knew all the words to 'Puff, the Magic Dragon.' I was definitely smitten after that."

Adding to Seckinger's appeal was the bonus that, as it turned out, they both went to Calvary Church on Los Gatos Boulevard.

"The idea of her being local and going to the same church, that was important to me," recalls Seckinger. "It made it worth pursuing."

Hammond asked around at the church as to what kind of guy Seckinger was and was pleased to hear everyone thought highly of him. Therefore, she temporarily abandoned a few of her "rules" about first dates, and agreed to meet him at La Hacienda for a drink.

"I was informed that John was a good guy, so I agreed to forego the 5-mile run and meet him for a margarita. Oops, there went the no-alcohol rule," she says. "I thought he was really sweet, he had a good aura, and I liked him."

Seckinger coached the basketball team for 8-year-old boys at their church. Hammond's son Cameron, who was of that age at the time, wanted to join.

Once he was involved with her son on a weekly basis through the team, Hammond worried that dating Seckinger might not be a good idea or in her child's best interests. So she told him that they had to stop seeing each other romantically.

"We stopped dating for a while," Seckinger recalls. However, the two ended up spending a lot of time together over the next few months as he and her family interacted frequently at church and through team practices. Hammond could see that her family liked him and Seckinger could see what a special woman she was.

"She was such a warm and caring person to her kids and I thought this is what I want," he remembers. "Someone who gives to others and her family unconditionally, that counts for a lot in my book. That was a special quality."

Hammond realized she was falling for him, too.

"I really got to know him better, and I thought there was a real likelihood that I could fall in love with him," she says.

Hammond will never forget the night she realized Seckinger was the man for her.

"I was talking with one of my girlfriends one day, and she was dating a great guy, and I said, 'Gee, why can't I meet a guy like that?' And then it was like a light went off in my head—I had already met him. I realized I was being way too overprotective. At that point, I called him and I asked him out."

The couple went out for their second "real" date on Valentine's Day—and from that day forward neither has dated anyone else.

Hammond and Seckinger have now been married for more than five years. At their wedding, they danced to their special song—"Puff, the Magic Dragon."

"He asked my children if he could marry me before asking me," Hammond recalls. "I thought that was really sweet. He's just a great guy, I can't say enough about him."

The two say that Valentine's Day has always remained special to them, and they take turns each year planning something special to share.

This year, it's Seckinger's turn, and Hammond says she can't wait to see what he has planned for them.

Doug and Marianne
Lucchesi Hamilton

Marianne Lucchesi Hamilton of Los Gatos says she almost missed her "Mr. Right" because the photo he put in his profile was a bit misleading.

In the first few minutes of the year 2000, Marianne made a New Year's resolution that she would meet someone special.

"I felt confident the New Millennium would bring me a new mate," she says.

So Marianne went to one of the most popular dating websites—Matchmaker
.com—to create a profile and fill out the lengthy questionnaire. She added some criteria of her own, which she thought would narrow down the choices of mates—age, education, profession, location and more—but nevertheless received around 300 responses. Wading through the onslaught proved to be time-consuming.

"I was spending an inordinate amount of time online," she recalls. "Online dating was becoming a full-time job. Fortunately, Matchmaker.com had a 'lock-out' feature that could be used to block any unwanted incoming messages. I used it a number of times."

After a while, Marianne says she got a "friendly, articulate note" from a "DAH"—Marianne said many men on Matchmaker went by their initials.

"The intelligent humor in the message immediately caught my attention," she remembers. "This guy sounded terrific!"

Eagerly, Marianne looked up the man's online profile to read more about him and hopefully see a photo. However, what she saw was not what she had hoped for.

"Unsmiling, unfriendly-looking," she says. "Possible axe murderer material. So much for the romance of the century."

Marianne decided to continue looking elsewhere, certainly not lacking in available choices the site was delivering to her computer.

"Between January and the end of May, I either dated or corresponded with 72 men," she says. "Talk about speed dating!"

Marianne says that during this time, "DAH" continued to send her notes every so often—and they were hard to ignore.

"Each time I'd receive one of his notes, I'd think, 'Wow, this guy sounds great, gotta check him out.' But inevitably, that scary picture brought me up short."

That year, Marianne went on vacation over Memorial Day weekend. She returned to yet another email message from the mysterious "DAH." This message proposed giving him a chance to impress her in person.

Doug Hamilton says he never gave up contacting Marianne because, in his searches, what she seemed to offer kept drawing him back, above and beyond the other prospects he was seeing out there in cyberspace. Plus, he says, the fact that she was still posting on the site showed him that she obviously hadn't found anyone that promising yet, either.

"I liked her picture," he says. The fact she was within a few years of his age also sweetened the deal, as well as the depth and quality of what she had to say. "By the sound of her emails, she could really communicate. You'd be surprised how many people couldn't."

Marianne finally decided to give "DAH" a chance, and agreed to meet him for coffee at one of her favorite spots, The Los Gatos Coffee Roasting Company on Main Street. The moment she saw him, she remembers kicking herself for avoiding him for so long.

"Dark hair, nicely cut, just starting to go gray at the temples. Strong arms and legs, tanned. Very trim and fit-looking in his biking shorts and T-shirt. Killer blue eyes. Altogether, quite yummy," she recalls.

Doug recalls a similar reaction.

"I was just blown away," he says. "I was immediately physically attracted, which was important. Plus she was funny, charming and comfortable in her own skin. And she didn't try too hard to impress me. We had an equal give-and-take in the conversation. That was so refreshing."

The two hit it off right away.

"We were together for the better part of the day," says Doug.

Marianne was happy to discover that Doug's "axe murderer" photo simply did not do him justice and that he was exactly what he said in his profile and messages to her.

That successful first date led to a successful second date—one that lasted 12 hours. The two went wine tasting for the annual Santa Cruz Vintner's Weekend, followed by a romantic dinner in Capitola.

The rest is history.

"In seemingly no time, his cottage in Saratoga was festooned with cobwebs. By the end of September we were co-habitating," says Marianne.

Doug and Marianne were married almost two years to the day of that successful second date, on June 2, 2002—and the wedding was held at one of the wineries they visited on that memorable second date. They now live in Los Gatos, and frequently visit Doug's two children in Lake Tahoe.

"Doug still never lets me forget the whole 'axe murderer' deal," jokes Marianne. "And I never forget to tell him how much I love him every day."

Not surprisingly, she says, she often does that by email.