Finding love online is common these days, more common than some think. Most people know at least one or two people who found a mate on the Internet, some through chat rooms, and some more formally through dating websites. And dating websites are amassing huge memberships.

Matchmaker.com boasts "millions" of members, and Match.com claims "more than 15 million members with profiles posted or who are active users."

These online dating services also take credit for countless successful matches and relationships. Match.com states that 200,000 members each year report "that they found the person they were seeking on the site," but the website doesn't tell if that means marriage.

Still, the numbers are impressive, and they may not be exaggerations.

Thanks to the Internet, for people of all ages and sexual preferences, modern dating has changed.

Meeting in cyberspace can take the "byte" out of awkward small talk. People can develop a relationship online before meeting face-to-face.

And online dating makes it easier to find a date without ever leaving the comfort of home or office and without having to hang out in bars or clubs. Plus, the Internet is open 24 hours a day.

For Sunnyvale's Peter Anning, Internet dating came highly recommended by friends.

"I had been in a situation where I was dumped. I really liked being in love, and I knew a couple people who met their spouses online," Anning says.

He signed up with Match.com about 3¹/2 years ago and met his partner about a year after he began using the site. They're still together.

Online dating services charge monthly fees, and members have found that these fees equate to finding people serious about wanting a relationship.

All adult age groups are represented; Match.com reports 55 percent are aged 30 or older, and 45 percent are under 30.

Match.com, Matchmaker.com and eHarmony operate similarly; after registering, a member submits a profile and then may search for possible matches. Some take the lead and contact another member via email; others sit back and wait to be contacted.

Odds are in favor of women receiving a contact first. Match.com's records show 60 percent of members are male and 40 percent are female.

Profiles include a list of multiple- choice questions, a few essay-style questions and personal information such as age, height and weight. There is also the option of posting a photograph.

Anning says it was difficult answering some of the multiple-choice questions such as, "What type of home do you prefer?" The choices included such places as a beach house or a loft in the city or a two-story house in the suburbs. More than one answer to such questions appealed to him, but he had to choose one.

Anning says some matches may be lost because of those difficult choices on the multiple-choice questions.

The profile also asks a member to identify his or her gender and gender preference for dating.

Anning wanted to date another man. Matchmaker.com and Match.com offer a same-gender search--eHarmony does not.

As in the real world, heterosexual relationships online often begin with the man approaching the woman. For Anning and other gay men, the approach is shared.

But every so often Anning received email messages from women who expressed an interest in him. He says he responded politely or simply ignored the message, figuring it was sent in error.

Online connections don't always involve a dating service.

Sunnyvale's Stephanie Henderson had her profile posted on AOL, which listed some of her interests as creative writing, dancing and music. She didn't post it there because she was looking for a date. But that's what happened.

In 2002, Chris McLaughlin read Henderson's profile, noticed their similar interests and emailed her, asking if she would critique a story he wrote.

That sparked instant messages between the two that lasted for hours at a time over several weeks. Then they talked on the phone for two or three months before they finally agreed to meet in person.

"We didn't exchange photos. I didn't ask him what he looked like, and he didn't ask me," Henderson says. "It didn't occur to me to know what he looked like."

Weeks went by before the couple confessed romantic feelings for each other.

Henderson and McLaughlin plan to be married in August.

According to Match.com, about 80 percent of its members have some college or a college degree, and 12 percent have advanced degrees.

Henderson is working on an advanced degree in clinical psychology and earning her license as a marriage and family therapist. Though she didn't plan it, she has managed to weave her online dating experience into her thesis.

She is conducting a study to determine if people with introverted personalities "are more likely to have a positive attitude regarding use of the Internet to meet others in which to engage in a romantic relationship."

For some, possibly the introverted, the computer monitor and keyboard act as a buffer for those awkward moments when first meeting someone and words are hard to come by. Chatting online removes some anxiety and gives one time to choose words more carefully. Then again, people such as Anning cringe at typos and are turned off by poor grammar.

"I'm one of those funny people. I'm aware of correct spelling and good punctuation," he says.

Still, the process of communicating through email or instant messaging is a way to get to know someone first before the physical attraction takes control.

Usually, online daters establish their own rules of engagement. These rules cover such things as who they talk with or how long they communicate online before meeting in person, under what circumstances and where they will first meet.

Anning set his standards pretty high.

"I had a rule that I would not respond to anyone unless they posted a picture," Anning says. "I figured if he didn't put it out there, he was a geek or just butt-ugly."

Something about this one particular man just clicked, and Anning abandoned his requirement and after several email exchanges--none that included a photo--he agreed to meet at a halfway point between their home cities.

"Well, it's my rule; I can break it," he says.