Willow Glen Resident
Columns
Mai Tais help build strong ties to Hawaii
By Dave Kehmeier
I'm writing this column in the posh lobby of a ridiculously swanky resort hotel on Maui. Our family is here for a two-week break from summer vacation. We're not actually staying at this place. Heavens, no.
We've got a mortgage to pay. Besides, I don't like the color scheme.
Instead, we're sharing a condo with my in-laws on a part of Maui where reality exists. It gets pretty hot and bothered there in the afternoons. So for an escape, I'm squatting here, trying to look like I belong by acting blasé in an entitled sort of way.
To complete the ruse, I'm sipping a Mai Tai I ordered from the lobby bar, which will undoubtedly render this column largely incomprehensible or at least, pointless.
Our first trip to Hawaii was to Kauai for Ellie's and my honeymoon 18 years ago, give or take a couple of years. Every other time we've come to Hawaii, it's been to Maui with our kids, Ellie's parents and one or more of her brothers, wives and cousins.
What these vacations lack in romance, they make up in togetherness. It's tough doing Hawaii on the cheap, but we always give it our best shot.
For example, I'm doing my part right now by eating a whole bowl of bar nuts so I won't need much dinner. My mother-in-law is the frugal-meister, though. She always packs a huge frozen ham in her carry-on bag--I'm not kidding--that she bakes, and we feed on it for days. I assume that makes her feel better about the money she blows on all the boxes of Mauna Loa chocolate-covered macadamia nuts she takes back as gifts in her ham-less carry-on bag.
We've had some memorable vacations here. The second time to Maui, Will got a raging ear infection that earned him a trip to the Maui Medical Center. Just when he was feeling better, Emily got sucker-punched by a wave that ruptured her eardrum, as diagnosed at the Kihei Clinic. A couple of days after that, Ellie and I got caught in the surge while snorkeling over some shallow rocks. I got 10 stitches in my knee and Ellie got 25 in her foot at Urgent Care Maui. We now refer fondly to this as our Maui Medical Tour '98.
But we've had some good trips, too. This is definitely one of our best, thanks to the dolphin cruise we took with the Pacific Whale Foundation. This was a special treat for Emily, who has been a dolphin fanatic ever since she was old enough to say "eee-ee-(click)-(click)-eeeeee-tut-tut." We were hoping to maybe glimpse a few dolphin-like splashes in the distance from the boat. But we got lucky. Several groups of wild spinner dolphins were hanging out in a cove where the boat stopped to let us snorkel. They swam around and under us for several minutes. Sometimes they were close enough to reach out and potentially lose a finger in their grinning mouths. Emily is still hyperventilating over the experience.
The Mai Tais have had a positive impact as well. This one isn't bada little heavy on the pineapple juice, perhaps. I'm something of a Mai Tai expert now, having weaseled the recipe out of a bartender at the Tommy Bahama's restaurant a few days ago. I've been making them at the condo every evening since. My mother-in-law raves over them. Last night she said, "Every sip tickles my insides!" Then, she asked if I could make them back at home. I may have stumbled onto a way to help smooth over the hard feelings when I beat her in our tomato-growing competition this summer.
Anyway, back to what I think may be turning out to be the point of this column: The best Mai Tai I ever had was at a little grass shack of a bar called Tahiti Nui's on our honeymoon 16-20 years ago. It was so strong, they served it with a juice chaser. This was on our way to Tunnels Beach, a popular snorkeling spot. When we got there, Ellie spread a towel out on the sand and promptly fell asleep. I waded out waist-deep and stood with my face in the water for who knows how long, mesmerized by the fish and my toes.
Sadly, this may be one of our last family vacations to Maui. Emily will be going into eighth grade, so it's about time for her to start working summers at Carl's Jr. to pay for college. Plus there are several other family trips we need to fit in while we can, including one to Europe soon to visit relatives and friends, and because Emily asked recently, "Is London in Paris?"
We'll come back here sometime, though; our attraction to Hawaii is pretty strong.
Apparently, so are the Mai Tais.
Dave Kehmeier can be reached at Kehmeiere@ix.netcom.com.
